![MARCH FEATURED ARTIST • garnet williams @itstransfat // garnet williams is a queer, trans, fat Black Drag Queen who has a spinal condition and uses a walker. they perform on stage under the Drag Queen name Trans Fat. their performances are infused with disability activism, queer sexuality, and fun and bold acts. garnet is also a singer and has performed in various musicals in addition to being the front person for a surf rock band, crimson wave @crimsonwaveband. we caught up with garnet where they tell us all about being a disabled Drag Queen, their music, and their hobby of customizing Black dolls. read more on luttecollective.com 👾
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portrait of garnet as transfat, photographed by ethan jollie.
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image description: transfat is a fat Black drag queen wearing a purple wig and has dramatic eye make up on. they are wearing @rebirthgarments — a loose super crop top in lime green, neon yellow, royal blue and aqua meshes and laces, and leggings in purple and green with black and white triangles. they are standing with their arms holding onto their royal blue walker.]()
MARCH FEATURED ARTIST • garnet williams @itstransfat // garnet williams is a queer, trans, fat Black Drag Queen who has a spinal condition and uses a walker. they perform on stage under the Drag Queen name Trans Fat. their performances are infused with disability activism, queer sexuality, and fun and bold acts. garnet is also a singer and has performed in various musicals in addition to being the front person for a surf rock band, crimson wave @crimsonwaveband. we caught up with garnet where they tell us all about being a disabled Drag Queen, their music, and their hobby of customizing Black dolls. read more on luttecollective.com 👾 . portrait of garnet as transfat, photographed by ethan jollie. . image description: transfat is a fat Black drag queen wearing a purple wig and has dramatic eye make up on. they are wearing @rebirthgarments — a loose super crop top in lime green, neon yellow, royal blue and aqua meshes and laces, and leggings in purple and green with black and white triangles. they are standing with their arms holding onto their royal blue walker. ![i thought about my relationship with sickness and my body a lot today. why i still feel a little ashamed and weird talking about it. i got so used to the fact that i looked “normal”, every time it came up, i felt uncomfortable. i got so ignored i started to ignore myself. but i am fed up feeling insignificant.
i thought if i was a silent, shy and introverted kid i would blend in. even though i was so loud in my mind. it got to a point i would not question anything, okay with anything, had a little opinion about anything. i had no idea about that persona i created to protect myself. i got stood out more and more, in a way i didn’t wanted to, trying to blend in. that wasn’t who i was and that would never be.
but when i started accepting every little thing about myself, i started to feel relieved. now i stood out with my own personality. now i have my own opinions. and more important, now i have my own community.
this little journey i started somewhere along the way doesn’t end today and won’t end tomorrow either. i will cringe over these things i wrote over a year or two but it’s just my truth now. i am glad i let it out. i am proud of who i am and i think that makes it worth everything.
id: photo of a shadow of beyza on a dusty road with little stones.]()
i thought about my relationship with sickness and my body a lot today. why i still feel a little ashamed and weird talking about it. i got so used to the fact that i looked “normal”, every time it came up, i felt uncomfortable. i got so ignored i started to ignore myself. but i am fed up feeling insignificant. i thought if i was a silent, shy and introverted kid i would blend in. even though i was so loud in my mind. it got to a point i would not question anything, okay with anything, had a little opinion about anything. i had no idea about that persona i created to protect myself. i got stood out more and more, in a way i didn’t wanted to, trying to blend in. that wasn’t who i was and that would never be. but when i started accepting every little thing about myself, i started to feel relieved. now i stood out with my own personality. now i have my own opinions. and more important, now i have my own community. this little journey i started somewhere along the way doesn’t end today and won’t end tomorrow either. i will cringe over these things i wrote over a year or two but it’s just my truth now. i am glad i let it out. i am proud of who i am and i think that makes it worth everything. id: photo of a shadow of beyza on a dusty road with little stones. ![we are in our second? third? lockdown for about three months now and i feel like i have never bonded with anything as i am with my room now. i spend most of my days at home before the pandemic too, but it never felt this peaceful -as i dare to say- like it was my own decision to stay home. maybe i am fooling myself and trying to cope with this situation by ignoring all the facts and making myself believe it was my decision all along.
i changed a lot of places within six years, lived with my family, friends and sometimes people i don’t even know. the sentiment i feel to my bed, or anywhere i sleep, is never changed. i eat, watch, sleep and cry in bed. even when i was a child and i needed to study, i would climb up to my bed.
i live with my father and my brother now, and i get this need of creating a bubble of my own even when we are living together. my room feels and looks different than the rest of the place, i try to seperate myself even though i am living with others. and i think that gives me that little bit of freedom i need to keep me sane.
id: photo 1- mirror selfie of beyza while she is sitting with one of her legs up, wearing a black sweater, a goose foot patterned vest and panties. there are four illustrations on the wall, unframed and a tapestry with sun and rainbow on it.
photo 2- a photo taken from up above of the floor. there is a persian rug on the ground with different shapes and earthy tones. legs showing with blue pyjamas and red socks on.
photo 3- a photo showing a corner of the room with a messy bed. it has white sheets and a white duvet, with four colorful pillows, a gray plush toy and a fluffy white coat.]()
we are in our second? third? lockdown for about three months now and i feel like i have never bonded with anything as i am with my room now. i spend most of my days at home before the pandemic too, but it never felt this peaceful -as i dare to say- like it was my own decision to stay home. maybe i am fooling myself and trying to cope with this situation by ignoring all the facts and making myself believe it was my decision all along. i changed a lot of places within six years, lived with my family, friends and sometimes people i don’t even know. the sentiment i feel to my bed, or anywhere i sleep, is never changed. i eat, watch, sleep and cry in bed. even when i was a child and i needed to study, i would climb up to my bed. i live with my father and my brother now, and i get this need of creating a bubble of my own even when we are living together. my room feels and looks different than the rest of the place, i try to seperate myself even though i am living with others. and i think that gives me that little bit of freedom i need to keep me sane. id: photo 1- mirror selfie of beyza while she is sitting with one of her legs up, wearing a black sweater, a goose foot patterned vest and panties. there are four illustrations on the wall, unframed and a tapestry with sun and rainbow on it. photo 2- a photo taken from up above of the floor. there is a persian rug on the ground with different shapes and earthy tones. legs showing with blue pyjamas and red socks on. photo 3- a photo showing a corner of the room with a messy bed. it has white sheets and a white duvet, with four colorful pillows, a gray plush toy and a fluffy white coat. ![this is where i usually work, always with some turkish tea and my cat!! i am used to working in bed cause it’s a lot more comfier, but it kept me from working and ruined my posture so i am trying to get used to working on a table.
i started drawing in high school. it was just keeping me busy in lessons and kind of like a hobby. i didn’t knew you can make a living out of it?? then when i was in college i never made an effort to learn the basics of it or even just sketching, i was too depressed because of school. back in march last year i started illustrating every day, seeing it pay off after a while gave me the motivation i needed.
i mostly draw in digital as i mentioned before. i really like it cause i can make hundreds of mistakes and still not fuck it up!! i get inspired from what i do in everyday life and my feelings, but lately i just draw lonely girls with a lot to think about. i love using a lot of colors, childish lines and some doodles.
now i take it slow and dont try to pressure myself about style, productivity and creating a full piece almost everyday. it just feels like i am trying to catch up with everyone. i gave up on this ridiculously higher standards of instagram culture which is very unhealthy for me. now i create things whenever i want to or do nothing for a week which feels SO much better. 🤸🏼♀️
image description: picture taken above of a wooden desk. there is an ipad and an ipad pencil on the right side of the table. on top of it there is a cat sitting looking up. on the left side of the table there is a white cup with tea in it, a book with a face illustration cover in blue, pink and red colors. beneath that is a big metal colored pencil box in the color red, and an orange folder. above them are two pencil boxes with different colored pencils and a yellow scissors. under the desk is a persian rug with earthy tones and two feet with red socks on.]()
this is where i usually work, always with some turkish tea and my cat!! i am used to working in bed cause it’s a lot more comfier, but it kept me from working and ruined my posture so i am trying to get used to working on a table. i started drawing in high school. it was just keeping me busy in lessons and kind of like a hobby. i didn’t knew you can make a living out of it?? then when i was in college i never made an effort to learn the basics of it or even just sketching, i was too depressed because of school. back in march last year i started illustrating every day, seeing it pay off after a while gave me the motivation i needed. i mostly draw in digital as i mentioned before. i really like it cause i can make hundreds of mistakes and still not fuck it up!! i get inspired from what i do in everyday life and my feelings, but lately i just draw lonely girls with a lot to think about. i love using a lot of colors, childish lines and some doodles. now i take it slow and dont try to pressure myself about style, productivity and creating a full piece almost everyday. it just feels like i am trying to catch up with everyone. i gave up on this ridiculously higher standards of instagram culture which is very unhealthy for me. now i create things whenever i want to or do nothing for a week which feels SO much better. 🤸🏼♀️ image description: picture taken above of a wooden desk. there is an ipad and an ipad pencil on the right side of the table. on top of it there is a cat sitting looking up. on the left side of the table there is a white cup with tea in it, a book with a face illustration cover in blue, pink and red colors. beneath that is a big metal colored pencil box in the color red, and an orange folder. above them are two pencil boxes with different colored pencils and a yellow scissors. under the desk is a persian rug with earthy tones and two feet with red socks on.
