• Some people make the world a better place by simply being a part of it. Estella - You were truly one of those incredibly kind and generous people. You taught us that love is love and there is always love in our hearts when we seek to find it. You loved us like your own children. Estella - our family nanny died peacefully last week. She lived with our family in our house for over 30 years ever since I was six months old. She, mom and dad were a team in raising all four of us. Where mumma would stop, she’d pick up. She was the foundation and bedrock of making sure not only were the logistics of our lives taken care of but also infused with love, care and connection in every little detail. Estella - you gave mummy and papa the ability to be the best parents they could be. Not only that, you were my doula and the world’s best caregiver when I went home for my second maternity leave. You’d wake up several times when Saveer would wake up and ask me to go back to sleep after nursing and burp and change his diaper so I could rest. The next morning I would have freshly cooked alu parathas served with so much love.  I cry every day with the grief of your death but also with a bigger grief that I didn’t tell you enough how much I loved you and how much you mattered to me, to our family. I didn’t call you and let you know what a difference you have made in the person I am and the privileges I enjoy. I am experiencing a lot of guilt and shame through this. Just as your life had so much meaning, I think your death has even more meaning for me. You taught me how precious life is and how to honor all the people you’ve added so much to my life. I hope to honor your life by “trying” to bring more love, gratitude and generosity in the world especially by showing up with love for all the people who raised me alongside mumma and papa.  I wish I could say goodbye one more time, one more thank you for the delicious school lunches and gourmet meals when I’d come home from boarding school. One more thank you for wiping my tears and listening so patiently. Thank you for making home feel like home. Thank you for keeping the magic and innocence alive in our childhood.  Much love...
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    Some people make the world a better place by simply being a part of it. Estella - You were truly one of those incredibly kind and generous people. You taught us that love is love and there is always love in our hearts when we seek to find it. You loved us like your own children. Estella - our family nanny died peacefully last week. She lived with our family in our house for over 30 years ever since I was six months old. She, mom and dad were a team in raising all four of us. Where mumma would stop, she’d pick up. She was the foundation and bedrock of making sure not only were the logistics of our lives taken care of but also infused with love, care and connection in every little detail. Estella - you gave mummy and papa the ability to be the best parents they could be. Not only that, you were my doula and the world’s best caregiver when I went home for my second maternity leave. You’d wake up several times when Saveer would wake up and ask me to go back to sleep after nursing and burp and change his diaper so I could rest. The next morning I would have freshly cooked alu parathas served with so much love.  I cry every day with the grief of your death but also with a bigger grief that I didn’t tell you enough how much I loved you and how much you mattered to me, to our family. I didn’t call you and let you know what a difference you have made in the person I am and the privileges I enjoy. I am experiencing a lot of guilt and shame through this. Just as your life had so much meaning, I think your death has even more meaning for me. You taught me how precious life is and how to honor all the people you’ve added so much to my life. I hope to honor your life by “trying” to bring more love, gratitude and generosity in the world especially by showing up with love for all the people who raised me alongside mumma and papa.  I wish I could say goodbye one more time, one more thank you for the delicious school lunches and gourmet meals when I’d come home from boarding school. One more thank you for wiping my tears and listening so patiently. Thank you for making home feel like home. Thank you for keeping the magic and innocence alive in our childhood.  Much love...
  • When we are on the other side of the pandemic, I hope we are comfortable talking about mental health and can expand on our ability to choose empathy and compassion. It is beautiful to see how much more socially acceptable it is to talk about the uncomfortable topics, especially in our workplaces. It is much more okay to walk into a meeting and share how we are not feeling okay and need help and support than I have ever seen in the past. It is more acceptable to cry with a friend or simply say I am struggling and don’t know how to keep my head above water. It is beautiful to see our workplaces evolving and vulnerability and courage entering all walks of life. Yet, the reality is that even before (and after) the pandemic, someone had their own version of COVID happening in their lives and so many of us had to pretend as if everything was fine when everything was NOT fine. I’d invite you to think of how can you show up to create a more inclusive and accepting world around us not just today but always because ultimately when each human being feels seen and heard, they bring their best to the table and our families, communities and organizations all thrive through this process!
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    When we are on the other side of the pandemic, I hope we are comfortable talking about mental health and can expand on our ability to choose empathy and compassion. It is beautiful to see how much more socially acceptable it is to talk about the uncomfortable topics, especially in our workplaces. It is much more okay to walk into a meeting and share how we are not feeling okay and need help and support than I have ever seen in the past. It is more acceptable to cry with a friend or simply say I am struggling and don’t know how to keep my head above water. It is beautiful to see our workplaces evolving and vulnerability and courage entering all walks of life. Yet, the reality is that even before (and after) the pandemic, someone had their own version of COVID happening in their lives and so many of us had to pretend as if everything was fine when everything was NOT fine. I’d invite you to think of how can you show up to create a more inclusive and accepting world around us not just today but always because ultimately when each human being feels seen and heard, they bring their best to the table and our families, communities and organizations all thrive through this process!
  • It has been such an incredibly hard season for parents. Parenting was never easy but the world we are in is so much harder. I have not had a single “real” conversation with another parent who is not feeling some version of overwhelm, anxiety, stress, guilt, shame, self-doubt, and loneliness. You are all not alone. This is indeed very hard. I am so grateful and excited to have two wonderful people @stephanielharrison at @newhappyco and @nisanity bring us this incredible workshop this afternoon to provide easy, practical tips to help support your mental health, build your resilience, and even cultivate moments of joy and peace in this incredibly hard time. Here is the link to sign up - https://lnkd.in/gSy8Cr6
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    It has been such an incredibly hard season for parents. Parenting was never easy but the world we are in is so much harder. I have not had a single “real” conversation with another parent who is not feeling some version of overwhelm, anxiety, stress, guilt, shame, self-doubt, and loneliness. You are all not alone. This is indeed very hard. I am so grateful and excited to have two wonderful people @stephanielharrison at @newhappyco and @nisanity bring us this incredible workshop this afternoon to provide easy, practical tips to help support your mental health, build your resilience, and even cultivate moments of joy and peace in this incredibly hard time. Here is the link to sign up - https://lnkd.in/gSy8Cr6
  • Choosing love for myself means showing up for myself with the same kindness and compassion as I would for someone else, I love. It means investing in myself – my longings, my needs, my dreams, and respecting and loving them deeply. It means reminding myself every single day, especially in the hard moments when it is hard to love myself, when I didn’t act in integrity with my values that I am deserving of my own love and belonging and have the power to make a different choice again. When my children make a mistake, my words are often – “I know this is hard, you are just getting started. In this house we learn by making mistakes. Let us try this again.” This is so instinctive and natural with people we love. Yet, somehow, we are never taught to extend that same love for ourselves. Just like anything else, it takes intention, commitment and most importantly practice. I find that the more I can practice this with myself, my ability to choose love for others expand. My ability to see the abundance and goodness in the world gets deeper. I can show up with more power in the world, in asking for what I need, in drawing better boundaries, in sharing my point of view in a meeting because it becomes easier to recognize that I said what needed to be said or didn’t say what was not needed because my own heart is full, worthy and deserving of my own love FIRST. Do I always succeed – absolutely not. Yet, a bit by bit this muscle strengthens. It is about noticing the attachment that comes to the love and acceptance of others. I am not trivializing the impact of feeling like you are truly seen and heard in a relationship, on a team or in an organization. It is deeply powerful. And, it is the attachment that diminishes our own power. Full link in bio... If you liked this post, check out Kristin Neff who is the pioneer of self-compassion and @tarasophiamohr who has written significantly on related topics and been a big influence in my work and life.
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    Choosing love for myself means showing up for myself with the same kindness and compassion as I would for someone else, I love. It means investing in myself – my longings, my needs, my dreams, and respecting and loving them deeply. It means reminding myself every single day, especially in the hard moments when it is hard to love myself, when I didn’t act in integrity with my values that I am deserving of my own love and belonging and have the power to make a different choice again. When my children make a mistake, my words are often – “I know this is hard, you are just getting started. In this house we learn by making mistakes. Let us try this again.” This is so instinctive and natural with people we love. Yet, somehow, we are never taught to extend that same love for ourselves. Just like anything else, it takes intention, commitment and most importantly practice. I find that the more I can practice this with myself, my ability to choose love for others expand. My ability to see the abundance and goodness in the world gets deeper. I can show up with more power in the world, in asking for what I need, in drawing better boundaries, in sharing my point of view in a meeting because it becomes easier to recognize that I said what needed to be said or didn’t say what was not needed because my own heart is full, worthy and deserving of my own love FIRST. Do I always succeed – absolutely not. Yet, a bit by bit this muscle strengthens. It is about noticing the attachment that comes to the love and acceptance of others. I am not trivializing the impact of feeling like you are truly seen and heard in a relationship, on a team or in an organization. It is deeply powerful. And, it is the attachment that diminishes our own power. Full link in bio... If you liked this post, check out Kristin Neff who is the pioneer of self-compassion and @tarasophiamohr who has written significantly on related topics and been a big influence in my work and life.
  • To all the parents out there with little kids – I see you. Figuring out how to fit in work and school and childcare while making space for some ease, joy, love, and compassion when there is so much suffering in the world is hard. If you were less kind to your kids than you wanted and perhaps yelled a bit more, know that you were not alone. If your kids didn’t want to be on zoom and you had to make sure that they still made it in time to their zoom calls and you had to get to yours, I see how hard you are trying. If your kids complained about feeling rushed at bedtime and wanted to sleep much later, I am reminding you that this is a hard season. If the younger kids struggled with the rest of the family on screens and wanted more paw patrol, I am both smiling with empathy and pulling my hair at the same time. For those of you who miss their parenting village and are unable to bring some of that back due to COVID – 19 risks, logistics or finances, I am with you. Parenting and fitting in work and life in COVID – 19 is hard. It has been hard for the last 5+ months and it is not going to be easy in the next few months. Yet, I also hope you see love, courage, and hope in ways you did not know you were capable of. I hope you savor your wins and how hard you are trying. I hope you see the beauty in how you tuck in your kids at bedtime and thank your partner for being supportive. I hope you see that you are doing your best to meet your deadlines at work. I hope you see your humanity in your tears and the wisdom in you as you make the right choices for your family. I hope you see your courage when you say sorry to your kids after yelling at them. I hope you seek help when you can and give love when you can. I hope you know that some balls will need to drop, and you check in with yourself everyday to make sure you are dropping the right balls.    I had a very hard week as school started last week. I needed to write and hear this to remind myself of my own strength and more importantly what we can all get through together with love, kindness, and courage! Thank you to those in my village who make this journey a lot more joyful! Happy weekend everyone
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    To all the parents out there with little kids – I see you. Figuring out how to fit in work and school and childcare while making space for some ease, joy, love, and compassion when there is so much suffering in the world is hard. If you were less kind to your kids than you wanted and perhaps yelled a bit more, know that you were not alone. If your kids didn’t want to be on zoom and you had to make sure that they still made it in time to their zoom calls and you had to get to yours, I see how hard you are trying. If your kids complained about feeling rushed at bedtime and wanted to sleep much later, I am reminding you that this is a hard season. If the younger kids struggled with the rest of the family on screens and wanted more paw patrol, I am both smiling with empathy and pulling my hair at the same time. For those of you who miss their parenting village and are unable to bring some of that back due to COVID – 19 risks, logistics or finances, I am with you. Parenting and fitting in work and life in COVID – 19 is hard. It has been hard for the last 5+ months and it is not going to be easy in the next few months. Yet, I also hope you see love, courage, and hope in ways you did not know you were capable of. I hope you savor your wins and how hard you are trying. I hope you see the beauty in how you tuck in your kids at bedtime and thank your partner for being supportive. I hope you see that you are doing your best to meet your deadlines at work. I hope you see your humanity in your tears and the wisdom in you as you make the right choices for your family. I hope you see your courage when you say sorry to your kids after yelling at them. I hope you seek help when you can and give love when you can. I hope you know that some balls will need to drop, and you check in with yourself everyday to make sure you are dropping the right balls.    I had a very hard week as school started last week. I needed to write and hear this to remind myself of my own strength and more importantly what we can all get through together with love, kindness, and courage! Thank you to those in my village who make this journey a lot more joyful! Happy weekend everyone
  • Yes, it is over 5 months of this strange way of living. A lot is hard, uncomfortable, and painful – inside our home and outside in the world. And then there is a lot that is beautiful, abundant and joyful. Perhaps such is life. Always. One of the most beautiful gifts of this season has been my relationship with myself. With so much of my external life taken away almost overnight (that I acutely miss), I have had this beautiful experience of getting to know and love myself even more fully. I have had space to confront and process my fears and things that felt terribly scary a few months back but no longer terrify me with the same intensity. I have learnt to truly dream in a way I hadn’t in a very long time – you know those long lost longings both big and small that you tell yourself have to wait – I have nurtured them a lot more in my heart even if not fully out in the world. I am more aware of needs and my triggers - when I need to sit with my pain and when it has served its purpose and I need to let it go (doesn’t mean I can always do it easily). I am more aware of the mistakes I make, when my vulnerability doesn’t serve a purpose, when I need better boundaries. and when I am holding on to something that was never mine in the first place. This journey also means I sometimes discover things I don’t like to confront about myself, insights that can trigger shame or guilt. The beauty of having a rich relationship with myself means it is becoming a bit easier to look at myself in the mirror and love myself because of the wounds and bruises not inspite of them. With awareness comes the courage to ask, to laugh, to cry, to say no and to start again even when giving up feels safer and easier. I am learning to hold on to what matters even when holding comes with pain and discomfort. And somewhere very slowly, that has helped me understand and love my family more fully, show up with more courage, empathy and compassion and make decisions driven by my values. It starts with choosing love, empathy and compassion for myself... What are you learning? Who are you becoming? Deep gratitude to Jac McNeil for guiding me to choosing love and showing up with power....
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    Yes, it is over 5 months of this strange way of living. A lot is hard, uncomfortable, and painful – inside our home and outside in the world. And then there is a lot that is beautiful, abundant and joyful. Perhaps such is life. Always. One of the most beautiful gifts of this season has been my relationship with myself. With so much of my external life taken away almost overnight (that I acutely miss), I have had this beautiful experience of getting to know and love myself even more fully. I have had space to confront and process my fears and things that felt terribly scary a few months back but no longer terrify me with the same intensity. I have learnt to truly dream in a way I hadn’t in a very long time – you know those long lost longings both big and small that you tell yourself have to wait – I have nurtured them a lot more in my heart even if not fully out in the world. I am more aware of needs and my triggers - when I need to sit with my pain and when it has served its purpose and I need to let it go (doesn’t mean I can always do it easily). I am more aware of the mistakes I make, when my vulnerability doesn’t serve a purpose, when I need better boundaries. and when I am holding on to something that was never mine in the first place. This journey also means I sometimes discover things I don’t like to confront about myself, insights that can trigger shame or guilt. The beauty of having a rich relationship with myself means it is becoming a bit easier to look at myself in the mirror and love myself because of the wounds and bruises not inspite of them. With awareness comes the courage to ask, to laugh, to cry, to say no and to start again even when giving up feels safer and easier. I am learning to hold on to what matters even when holding comes with pain and discomfort. And somewhere very slowly, that has helped me understand and love my family more fully, show up with more courage, empathy and compassion and make decisions driven by my values. It starts with choosing love, empathy and compassion for myself... What are you learning? Who are you becoming? Deep gratitude to Jac McNeil for guiding me to choosing love and showing up with power....
  • This was one of the questions we explored deeply in our coach training and revisiting this has been particularly poignant in this season of my life. For me, the answer was clear then and it still holds true – I have a hard time being with my tears & difficult emotions. I have a lot of judgment toward how I feel. Right now, I am in the midst of a lot of grief, uncertainty and pain unpacking relationships with the outside world and my own self. I have lots of questions, dreams, and longings for which I do not have answers and I like to have clear answers. Sometimes, the pain of the outside world feels too heavy and the injustices and the voices that are silenced and marginalized makes me want to yell. I am realizing that my hormones can have a big impact on my feelings, and I do not always know how to best take care of myself at certain times of the month. All of this with two little kids and no childcare, camps, and schools (by choice) as I do not have the courage to take a risk (yet!) makes me overwhelmed at times. The monotony of this new life even though I have a taken a lot of steps to honor my needs is making things hard for me. I miss so much of my pre-pandemic life and I know I need to grieve and make space for all that feels raw and tender in this moment. There are days when it all feels heavy. I am skilled at carrying the weight of my life, but the heaviness is all there. Some days I cry a little and some days a lot. I heal and find reasons and ways to smile and joy. And, there for sure is a LOT of joy and gratitude and I recognize how much privilege I have in my life. And sometimes, it is that very privilege and that others do not that makes me cry. It is my longing to be a part of the solution that makes me cry… I am good at seeking help and taking care of my needs but being with my feelings is hard and I often want to fix things overnight. I know that I am going through these feelings as I need to learn to sit with my pain, not instantly problem solve or push aside my feelings but stay curious and open to what I am learning. And even though I know this is all an incredible learning opportunity, some days I want to simply give up. Full post in bio
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    This was one of the questions we explored deeply in our coach training and revisiting this has been particularly poignant in this season of my life. For me, the answer was clear then and it still holds true – I have a hard time being with my tears & difficult emotions. I have a lot of judgment toward how I feel. Right now, I am in the midst of a lot of grief, uncertainty and pain unpacking relationships with the outside world and my own self. I have lots of questions, dreams, and longings for which I do not have answers and I like to have clear answers. Sometimes, the pain of the outside world feels too heavy and the injustices and the voices that are silenced and marginalized makes me want to yell. I am realizing that my hormones can have a big impact on my feelings, and I do not always know how to best take care of myself at certain times of the month. All of this with two little kids and no childcare, camps, and schools (by choice) as I do not have the courage to take a risk (yet!) makes me overwhelmed at times. The monotony of this new life even though I have a taken a lot of steps to honor my needs is making things hard for me. I miss so much of my pre-pandemic life and I know I need to grieve and make space for all that feels raw and tender in this moment. There are days when it all feels heavy. I am skilled at carrying the weight of my life, but the heaviness is all there. Some days I cry a little and some days a lot. I heal and find reasons and ways to smile and joy. And, there for sure is a LOT of joy and gratitude and I recognize how much privilege I have in my life. And sometimes, it is that very privilege and that others do not that makes me cry. It is my longing to be a part of the solution that makes me cry… I am good at seeking help and taking care of my needs but being with my feelings is hard and I often want to fix things overnight. I know that I am going through these feelings as I need to learn to sit with my pain, not instantly problem solve or push aside my feelings but stay curious and open to what I am learning. And even though I know this is all an incredible learning opportunity, some days I want to simply give up. Full post in bio
  • We can often underestimate how much power each of us has in our ability to demonstrate leadership in our simple, everyday actions that create moments of belonging. Leadership doesn’t “just” emerge from those at the top but from everyone in a system. A healthy dose of empathy, listening and deep care especially in these times to make others feel seen, heard and validated for their dreams and fears, longings and losses, challenges and joys is a huge undervalued art of leadership because the reality is that most of us experience all of these emotions multiple times in a given week, sometimes even in a given day and can often feel alone. Creating a culture on your team, community or family where people feel safe enables them to bring ideas to the table, express themselves and contribute more fully. Don’t diminish your power as a leader if you are not in a position of formal authority. The way you show up can inspire others to grow, practice courage, take meaningful action and in turn lead more effectively. What ideas do you have to create moments of belonging for others?
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    We can often underestimate how much power each of us has in our ability to demonstrate leadership in our simple, everyday actions that create moments of belonging. Leadership doesn’t “just” emerge from those at the top but from everyone in a system. A healthy dose of empathy, listening and deep care especially in these times to make others feel seen, heard and validated for their dreams and fears, longings and losses, challenges and joys is a huge undervalued art of leadership because the reality is that most of us experience all of these emotions multiple times in a given week, sometimes even in a given day and can often feel alone. Creating a culture on your team, community or family where people feel safe enables them to bring ideas to the table, express themselves and contribute more fully. Don’t diminish your power as a leader if you are not in a position of formal authority. The way you show up can inspire others to grow, practice courage, take meaningful action and in turn lead more effectively. What ideas do you have to create moments of belonging for others?
  • I know that as much as I didn't want to accept it at first, I have more privilege and power than I realize and a lot more unlearning (and learning) I need to do. Over the last few days I have felt a myriad of emotions. I have learnt to stay present and curious about what I am feeling but more importantly to channel my pain into action. I have learnt that the most important thing is to “start”, is to take some action and not worry if it is the perfect action. And, then I need to ensure that my first step is not the last step and that I continue my learning, and pivot my actions. One person can’t change the system but each of us in our own ways - whether it's a donation, a few hours at a protest, a social media message, a phone call to the local government can make a difference. The more we educate ourselves, the better we will be at empathizing and caring for our black friends and co-workers and taking more action. I for the first time had lots of conversations on this with my children this weekend and I know it won’t be the last time we discuss race. I have a long way to go and I am committed to doing my part and bringing my voice and action to the table to end systemic racism in this country.
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    I know that as much as I didn't want to accept it at first, I have more privilege and power than I realize and a lot more unlearning (and learning) I need to do. Over the last few days I have felt a myriad of emotions. I have learnt to stay present and curious about what I am feeling but more importantly to channel my pain into action. I have learnt that the most important thing is to “start”, is to take some action and not worry if it is the perfect action. And, then I need to ensure that my first step is not the last step and that I continue my learning, and pivot my actions. One person can’t change the system but each of us in our own ways - whether it's a donation, a few hours at a protest, a social media message, a phone call to the local government can make a difference. The more we educate ourselves, the better we will be at empathizing and caring for our black friends and co-workers and taking more action. I for the first time had lots of conversations on this with my children this weekend and I know it won’t be the last time we discuss race. I have a long way to go and I am committed to doing my part and bringing my voice and action to the table to end systemic racism in this country.
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