I love throwing sh*t out. Love, love, love, love, LOVE it. I throw out high heels and curtains, jewelry and fine china. (Okay so I don't actually throw it out. I donate it. But the point is, it's goneeeee.) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It isn't just the physical stuff: I'm also (creepily) good at throwing out old ideas, old identities, and old dreams. It's all holding me down. Even the nice stuff. Even the wonderful stuff. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Because sometimes wonderful can still be heavy. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I'm talking about careers. I'm talking about relationships. I'm talking about the greatest of intentions. We hate abandoning what we've invested. We spent money! We spent years! We spent time and energy and focus, and none of it can go to waste. But it's the sunk cost fallacy at its finest: you've already spent the money. You've already spent the time. And that can never change, no matter what you do next. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So what you do next should be independent. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Imagine taking a wrong turn in Topeka, Kansas and then deciding to keep going down that road—all the way to fucking Virginia—because you'd already covered the mileage? That's asinine, but it's what we do when we've gone to school for something (and therefore don't want to waste it), worked for a company for X amount of years (and therefore don't want to waste it), or even so much as spent $100 on a pair of heels we'll never wear again (and therefore don't want to waste it). ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ We keep driving in the wrong direction because we don't want anything to have been for naught. We don't want to feel like we made a bad decision, so we hang onto that decision and let it dictate all the rest of the things. Forever. And, uh, ever. Until you reach the coast and go, “Wait, I didn't want to be here! What am I doing?!” Because god forbid we lose an investment. But it's that same investment that's pushing you to do things that are making you unhappy—and that's what makes it a fallacy. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ On the surface, losing often looks a whole hell of a lot like losing—until you think about what you stand to gain.
You ever just have this uncontrollable urge to run and run and run until, by sheer force of nature, you shed all of the bullshit weighing you down? 🌪 Never ignore that urge.
Welp, I've done it. I've won the ass of the year award. Went to the airport and realized I didn't have my passport. Or my credit cards. Or my wallet. AFTER A THREE HOUR DRIVE TO GET THERE. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 👍👍👍 #monday #winning ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So in the meantime here is a photograph of an ivy-covered building in #Lastarria #Chile that clearly has its shit together better than I.
I'm OBSESSED with chandeliers. I think they look best when juxtaposed against the unexpected: a rustic cabin, edgy graffiti, a kitchen sink. This should come as no surprise, I suppose, given that it's the way I write: brash meets soft. Fuck meets class. (At least, when I'm not writing about tits.) (Just kidding, I never write about tits!) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It also happens to be the way I dress: nothing better than a pair of ripped jeans and pearls. And maybe it's also the way I live: understanding meets conviction. Adventure meets homebody. Small town girl meets big city...woman? At thirty-four years old, am I a woman now? (Fine, but if you call me ma'am I will cut you.) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The more I think of it, the more I'm convinced we're all just a bunch of surprising juxtapositions, trying to find our way home. And as much as we want to put ourselves in little boxes and claim we belong, maybe not belonging, for once, is the best way to do exactly that. 💕 #entrepreneursofinstagram #girlboss #dowhatyoulove #creativepreneur #creativebiz #livecreative #bossbabe #businessgoals #womeninbusiness #businessminded #businesswoman #onlinebusiness #onlinebiz #businesslife #blog #blogpost #amwriting #themiddlefingerproject #unfuckwithable
This is me sweating my ass of, trying to pretend like I am not sweating my ass off. The usual. 🤷♀️
A question I ask myself often: What does it mean to take care of myself right now? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It's FREAKING TERRIFYING how much we do on autopilot. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ We order the second glass of wine. Stay to be polite. Agree to help! HELPING EVERYBODY! Eat what everybody else is having because you don't want to make a fuss. Let them talk and talk and talk and monopolize all of your time. Give up your nights to things you don't care about. Spend your days doing a job you don't care about. Stick it out. Persevere. Persist. Even when it's not in your best interest, anymore, because not giving up is just what you do. Shrink instead of saying THE VERY HARD THING. Do the job for less money than it's worth. Meet them for coffee as a professional courtesy. Smile and nod your life away. It's easy to live your life out of habit. But soon those habits will have you waking up one day going, where did it all go? What do I have to show for it? And why do I suddenly look like a middle-aged biker? (The hardness of life shows up on your face, indeed.) ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I think being selectively selfish, sometimes, is some of the most important work for us to do. THAT SOUNDS SO WRONG, because contributing is also some of the most important work for us to do. But there's a time and place for everything—and maybe your time is today. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What does it mean to take care of myself right now? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I think the answer will surprise you. Oftentimes it's the exact opposite of what you've been doing all along. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ . . Read it again / share it via #linkinbio . . #livingmybestlife #inspiration #motivation #mindset #success #self #selfimprovement #selfhelp #confidence #joy #happiness #choices #fuckyes #entrepreneursofinstagram #girlboss #dowhatyoulove #creativebiz #livecreative #bossbabe #womeninbusiness #businessminded #businesswoman #onlinebusiness #onlinebiz #businesslife #blog #blogpost #amwriting #themiddlefingerproject
I AM SO SICK and have no idea where this shitstorm came from. I think the culprit was on the plane on my way to Europe—a day later my throat was all scratchy and now I am huddled in bed in #brugge, determined to feel better because I CANNOT MISS THIS AMAZING CITY. I like it better than #Amsterdam, because the pace is more calm and I feel like I could ride a bike without fearing for my life. 😂 All I want to do is go outside and take pictures of pretty things, like this library from #Santiago #Chile. The people downstairs think I’m a total maniac because all I keep ordering are actual lemons sent to the room. Probably think I have a kinky lemon fetish. 🤷♀️ All of the pharmacies were closed last night so I had to make do! Any other recommendations for magical, rapid fire nose and chest congestion relief?!? Counted my tissues this morning: THERE WERE FIFTY FOUR.