Insecurity in dating comes down to one thing: fear of being fully self-expressed. If you show all sides of yourself, will he stick around? Rather than find out, you try to hide the parts of your personality you think are unlovable or unworthy. Which is a fast track for people pleasing, eroding self-trust, numbing intuition, and all kinds of patterns that keep incredible women in disempowered dating dynamics. I know, because the fear of being fully seen (and therefore rejected) held me back my whole life. Then I realized for as deeply as I desired the emotional safety + security that comes from real intimacy, I was blocking it. By only letting men see the parts I thought they wanted, I put a barrier between my heart and theirs. I had to look at how my fear of being left was actually causing me to abandon myself. I cleaned that up (by shifting my Attraction Blueprint). Sometimes I still worry about what others think, but being so clear on who I am + what I’m about, loving + accepting that regardless of anyone else is what I always come back to. What would be possible in your love life, if you showed up fully self expressed? Knowing the whole spectrum of your multi-faceted self is what creates irresistible attraction. The range of who you are is a gift. Don’t be afraid to repel the wrong ones. Trust you’re simply magnetizing the right match.
Heading home after a very special week off the grid with my favorite person. In celebration of Shaun’s birthday a few days ago (we were swimming, crawling, and climbing through a cave with ancient Mayan sacrificial skeletons that day so wasn’t on my phone much 😉), I want to share a few of the reasons I love this man so damn much... Shaun, 🦋I love how kind hearted you are. You’re considerate, generous, and always striking up genuine conversation with strangers. 🦋 I love your intelligence. Your curiosity for knowledge through reading, learning, and designing patent worthy products impresses me. 🦋I love the little moments in our day. From you bringing me coffee in bed, doing yoga, cooking dinner together, and falling asleep snuggled up. The life we’re creating truly feels like home. 🦋 I love your unwavering belief in me. When I feel doubtful in my work, you reflect to me the importance of my vision, and to never give up on it. 🦋 I love your embodiment of balanced masculine energy. From our first date I sensed you were grounded, decisive, and had the capacity to hold my wild feminine flow. You reassured me when I felt insecure in our relationship, and listened without judgment when I vulnerably expressed my needs. 🦋 I love how we overlap on so many shared interests and views on life, but your organizational skills support my free spirit so a little difference there works well 🙃. 🦋I love your sense of adventure. We hike, camp, ski, music festival, and travel internationally so well together. 🦋I love everything that’s brought us to this moment, and everything to come.
This needs to be said. ⚡️ Not taking aligned action to create the love life you desire is not going to keep you in the same place (single, frustrated, doubtful etc) — it’s actually going to make things worse. Deciding it’s not the right time to receive support, guidance, accountability, and a clear path to date differently, and ultimately attract an incredible partner into your life, will only further perpetuate the limiting beliefs, fears, and patterns that lead to the same old results. The more time that passes in this place of resistance, the more there will be to unravel when you declare enough is enough. This isn’t to say it’s impossible. Any time you decide to change and powerfully move forward is worth celebrating. It’s never too late. But we often need to hit that rock bottom place before we’re willing to put some real skin in the game (with our time, energy, and money). What if you didn’t need to hit rock bottom, before opening up to the possibilities for change right now? The thing is - it’s never going to be the right time to transform. There’s going to be a million ‘logical’ reasons why taking a bold leap forward isn’t wise. And I legit don’t want you to spend any more time wondering if your man is really out there, and how to attract him in. Aligned action can look a lot of ways. Many paths lead to the same destination. But if you know deep down that what you’ve been doing isn’t working, it’s likely a nudge that you’re ready for something else. One more thing - acknowledging you can use support is actually very smart. Your desires are meant for you, and they can happen a lot faster with the right resources in place. Do you agree?
💥Rockstars ready for love I am so excited about the women I have the immense pleasure of serving as coaching clients. They have some common characteristics that are positioning them well for receiving their dream relationship😍 They... •Are so freaking done with their old patterns, beliefs, and blocks when it comes to love. They realize the way they’ve been showing up in dating hasn’t worked and are *willing* to try new things. •Believe love is meant for them. They may get discouraged at times, but that deep desire for attracting their partner is what fuels our work. •Receive my coaching (learning your attraction blueprint changes everything!). They trust me enough to be guided. They ask smart questions, are open to going deep, and frequently reach out for additional support. •Recognize results come faster when you learn from someone personally and stop trying to figure it out on your own. Shoutout to my beautiful clients! Y’all are the best 🙏🏼😘 If you want to swap the confusion and insecurity for magnetism and confidence, reach out. I’m happy to share resources for where you’re at (full disclosure - sometimes that’s my free material, sometimes that’s my coaching program). I promise to recommend what feels truly aligned. Let’s create a different love story for you. It’s ready when you are. 💖 . . . . #datingcoach #datingrules #datingadvice #datingtips #relationshipgoals #authenticrelating #attachmenttheory #intuition #selftrust
✌🏻Officially going off grid for the weekend with my amazing man. Our anniversary is tomorrow, and we’re getting the party started early. We’re off to a remote hot springs with a private cabin. We’ve packed fresh produce from our first CSA to make healthy meals, a bottle of wine, our yoga mats, and have a couples massage scheduled. Perfection in my book. I’ve been putting early mornings and late evenings into my business lately, and while Shaun has been so supportive of me living out my dreams, I’m ready to disconnect and get into nature with my best friend. See you beauties in a few days. Until then, I’ll be basking in this very special love. 💖
Sunny Sunday vibes 🌞🌼💛